Men. If you want to know what your family really wants from you, (spoiler, it’s not your bank account), then you’ll definitely want to read this article.
Today is Father’s Day 2018, and I can’t think of a better way to celebrate FATHERS and MEN, than to call men to rise up and be stronger, healthier, and happier.
A little context might be needed here: You see, it’s my personal belief that the community of men need to rally together, support each other, and call each other towards greatness. Problems arise when we lack this masculine community, and then rely on our wives to “makes us better men.” Sorry, but that’s like asking our wives to become our mommies, and no grown women want to raise her children and her husband. #manup #truthbomb
In this article I will directly challenge some old masculine concepts, but also insist that some parts of masculine culture stay very much in tact.
Let’s go over 3 big ways men and fathers can positively impact their families, and leave a legacy they will be proud of.
1. Love Your Wife.
I know, it sounds rather basic, but hear me out. First, when you focus on loving your wife, it shows your sons how to treat women. Now I don’t know about you, but that alone is pretty massive, and the world of men needs better role models. It starts with YOU.
Additionally, it shows your daughters how women should be treated by men. Imagine seeing the world through a young girl’s eyes, and watching your father speak to your mother with kindness, love her, take care of her, and support her in all her dreams. Do you think that young woman is going to settle for a man anything less than the greatness of her own father? I don’t think so.
Even if you don’t have any kids, loving your wife is the foundation of a positive and happy household. SAY IT WITH ME. HAPPY WIFE…. 😉
PS. Even if you’re no longer married, or in love with the person that used to be your wife, continuing to speak well of your children’s mother shows your children how to act with wisdom and grace. Those are two words I believe the world needs more of.
2. Show up. Be Present.
It’s a VERY common part of male culture to be told that your value as a man is your ability to make income. The more income you can make, the more valuable you are to your family.
Can we please put this outdated and ancient concept of masculinity to rest? Men, please STOP confusing your “net worth” with your “self worth.” Your family wants more than your wallet, they want YOU!
Yes, you’re right. They want you to be strong, and they want you to be the rock. But they also want you to be AROUND.
As Steven R. Covey reminds us in his book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People:” Put first things first.
3. Lead by Example.
I’ve studied great leaders for over a decade now, and I’ll tell you something ALL great leaders do, they LEAD! Meaning they go first and don’t ask people to do the things they won’t do. They are the alpha of the pack because they EARN the loyalty and respect of those that CHOOSE to follow them.
Q. Do you want your children to grow up healthy and strong? You be healthy and strong.
Q. Do you want your children to be in a loving relationship? You be in a loving relationship.
Q. Do you want your children to be spiritually grounded? Then YOU practice it.
Let’s be honest: Do you want your children to settle for anything less than an extraordinary life? Is there any part of you that hopes and wishes they spend their whole life working a J.O.B. (Just Above Broke), or do you want them to pursue their career or even their calling? Guess what my friend. They will GO where YOU GO.
I want to help: Below is a FREE resource to help you take one giant step towards the life of your dreams (…even if it’s scary, and you’ve never done anything like this before). One click is all it takes, and I’ll be on the other side to coach and support you through the process.
It’s the 21st century, but MANY men still feel trapped by ancient masculine scripts of “being the sole provider” and “men aren’t supposed to cry or have feelings.” It’s time for men to evolve consciously, and become more emotionally intelligent. It’s also time for men to come together and HELP EACH OTHER be better men.
In this brief article, I’ve called upon men to challenge outdated masculine concepts, and to open their minds and hearts to the idea that leaving a lasting legacy is more than a bank account. Here are some other ways to be a better Husband, Father, and Dad.
1. Love your wife. It creates a loving home environment, shows young men how to treat women and shows young women how they should be treated by men.
2. Show up and be present. You’re not going to win any family awards for how many hours you put in working for someone else. Put FAMILY first. Remember, they will feel your absence, and remember your presence.
3. Lead by example: BE the person you want them to grow up to be, and GO AFTER your dreams in such a way that it inspires them to go after theirs.
I’m curious. If you were to add a 4th or 5th item to this list, what would it be? I’d love to hear your thoughts below.
About the Author
Co-Founder of Legacy Life. Man on a Mission.
Patrick is a dedicated husband and father who believes that each of us, without exception, can shape our minds, bodies, and lives in any direction we choose. His mission is to help you get the insights, tools, and strategies you need to leave a legacy you are proud of.